songs i made

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Broken ties,
she was gasping for her life
Pushing past her jaded mind
she is calling for help
One more time,
slipping fast she held on tight.
This tranistion calls for fight
She is calling for help
With Silent Screams cried out.
Will we reach them now
It's time to scream out loud
Will we hear them now
Opened eyed she now see the other side
Grass is greener,
but it dies.
..
she is calling for help
now alive but she's fading scared to fight
losing faith she longs to (try)
She is calling for help



New day dawning, I wonder what it holds for me,Sun is shining, I Don't think that it will shine on meI look around, nothing seems to have changed,This dirty town, it hasn't some how rearrangedAnd I stand up, but I get knocked straight back down,"Just give it up" they say, "We just don't want you aroundNot one of us, and we don't like to share."Mouthful of dust, but I'll get even I swear...I hear your voice, call my name, but in my heart, It's still pouring rain,And it ain't pretty, no it ain't pretty...But you say "Hold on, hold on... believe me,All the plans against you one by one, will come undone."I shall overcome.Through my tears, I try to see your face,But doubt and fear come calling, and crowd my head with words of hate,I scream out please! Don't leave me hear alone,Down on my knees, without you and without hope...I hear your voice, call my name, but in my heart, It's still pouring rain,And it ain't pretty, no it ain't pretty...But you say "Hold on, hold on... believe me,Love is here and I won't let you down, stand your ground.Hold on, hold on... It's easy,All the plans against you one by one, will come undone."I know I shall overcome.Just in time you call my name, pull myself up, to fight again.I'll never let you down..."Hold on, hold on... believe me,Love is here and I won't let you down, stand your ground.Hold on, hold on... It's easy,All the plans against you one by one, will come undone."I know I shall overcome.





I'm coming home
I've been gone for far too long
Do you remember me at all?
Im leaving
Have I f**ked things up again?
Im dreaming
Too much time without you spent
It hurts
Wounds so sore
Now I'm torn
Now I'm torn
I've been far away
When I see your face
My heart burst into fire
Hearts burst into fire
You're not alone
I know I'm far from home
Do you remember me at all?
I'm leaving
Do you wait for me again?
I'm screaming
No more days without you spent
It hurts
Wounds so sore
Now I'm torn
Now I'm torn
I've been far away
When I see your face
My heart burst into fire
Hearts burst into fire
My bed's so cold, so lonely
No arms, just sheets to hold me
Has this world stopped turning?
Are we forever to be apart?
Forever to be apart...
It hurts
Wounds so sore
Now I'm torn
Now I'm torn
I've been far away
When I see your face
My heart burst into fire
Hearts burst into fire
I'm coming home
I've been gone for far too long
I'm coming,remember me at all?
Do you remember me at all?
Im leaving
Im dreaming
Im dreaming
MY HEART BURST INTO FIRE!!!.....

yes, it IS a song

Where is the moment we needed the most
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
They tell me your blue skies fade to gray
They tell me your passion's gone away
And I don't need no carryin' on
You stand in the line just to hit a new low
You're faking a smile with the coffee you go
You tell me your life's been way off line
You're falling to pieces every time
And I don't need no carryin' on
Because you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day
You had a bad day
Will you need a blue sky holiday?
The point is they laugh at what you say
And I don't need no carryin' on
You had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day
(Oooh.. a holiday..)
Sometimes the system goes on the blink
And the whole thing turns out wrong
You might not make it back and you know
That you could be well oh that strong
And I'm not wrong
(yeah...)
So where is the passion when you need it the most
Oh you and I
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
You've seen what you like
And how does it feel for one more time
You had a bad day
You had a bad day

okay...

okay, u may have noticed all of our last entries have been about ragging on Sk8r boy, IT IS FUN! he can burn in hell 4 all i care. i say rthis becuz...
~He totally humiliated angel
~he is a total arse
~he called angel a stalker and Psycopathic B!TCH!
~he thinks that he is all kool, just becuz he has a skateboard

I HATE HIM!!!!

I ABSOULUTLY, POSITIVLY HATE SK8R BOY! he has made a fool out of my friend angel, and has started stupid rumors, about her being a 'stalker' and a 'complete psycopathic b!tC#'

grrrrrrr!

ok, so alot has happend since yesterday.
-Sk8r Boy laughed at angel, and i hate him 4 tht
-I found out one of my poems had been deleted on a site so sum1 else cud have it
-Angel is acting all emo AGAIN!
-max and i are starting to get back in touch.
so may b not a WHOLE lot, but hey, nobodys perfect.


OMFG! we have shortened classes, and we have to go to high school next yr. i cant wait, but i kinda scared. help me!

God, It Hurts

I said 'God it hurts' And God said 'I Know' I said 'God I cry alot' And God said 'That's why I gave you tears' I said 'God I get so depressed' And God said 'That why I gave you sunshine' I said god I feel Alone' And god said 'That's why I gave you loved ones' I said 'god my loved one is dead' And God said'I watched mine nailed to the cross' I said God 'Where are they? ' And God said 'Mine is on my right and yours is in the light. I said 'God it hurts' And God said 'I know'

bored

i am bored and need entertainment. and i mean GOOD entertainment. i want to be able to go on dated w/ my gf. Angel luvs Sk8r boy! i miss my Brittney!!!!!

i know!

i know who angel likes, but i cant say1 it is killing me. i kno bcuz evry time i say she like him *i use the name* she blushes arpound her cheeks and nose. i know who it is, and u cant deny it angel!!! *but dont worry, i wont tell.lol.* neway, my life is kinda suckish, but then again, whose isnt? i love all of my ideots, and u cant have them!

omfg!

my life just got better! on my ss test, i got a 96! ium happy, but my science grade is bad! i wanna b a teacher or a lawer, and i cant if i have bad grades!!!!!! help!!!

i AM posting this, angel!

Her eyes do all the talking Dedicated to B.T.

The sun rises and falls
Yet she sits alone, waiting
Waiting for her life to begin
She sits alone, wondering why,
Why she is letting her mind get the best of her
She is so frustrated
She falls down with the fear
Falling out of her eyes,
Pain penetrating her heart,
She looks for help in her friends,
But there is nothing but frustration
Her eyes do all the talking
Even though she looks happy
She plays with their minds
Keeping the smile on
But her eyes tell her story
Of her pain, disappointment, loss
Life isn’t easy,
She doesn’t know what to do

depression...

This Feeling Of Depression

This feeling of depression
You tell me its ok
You assure me that if you close your eyes
You'll wake to a brand new day

This feeling of depression
You tell me its alright
So you close your eyes and rest your head
Lets put off this fight

This feeling of depression
I tell you its just this
A feeling is and never was
A thought one day you miss

This feeling of depression
You tell me you control
With every ounce and every bit
Held deep within your soul

This feeling of depression
Will go away so soon
I close my eyes but cannot sleep
Perhaps I’ll watch the moon

This feeling of depression
You’re sure I’ve felt it too
But when I scream I feel alone
But its something we all go through?

This feeling of depression
I lack the words to say
Has consumed my heart and left me bleeding
Perhaps to God I’ll pray

This feeling of depression
Will never call it quits
Perhaps its time to just throw down
And turn away your chips

This feeling of depression
You tried to tell me, why
You’re not here to hear me ever!
Not even when I die

*grrr* said the wannabe

'but, i dont wanna bring my laptop 2 pi day! grrrr!' christine mongomery is a wannabe popular, who wants to b able to do anything. neway, im bored. ANGEL! Y DID U ABANDON ME? and Kira didnt really like the fact max is going out w/ jason(her ex) becuz he dumped her, and neither did Mao(my gf) but on the plus side, my life rox, max and angel rnt cutting, or otherwise, and i got a kiss today. how r my idiots? i wanna know.

yay!

janae got a bf, and angel isnt cutting, and in am happy! *SQUEEEEE!* srry, ttly random, and un needed, neway.... i am happy and lets see if u can read this. comment w/ wat u think it says:
i antw omes ugarys nacks nda offeec ecauseb I am eryv appyh! antc u ellt?!? *queeeeeeeS*

depressed

i feel depressed my friends arent talking to me, and telling me whay they look so sad and depressed, and i feel like reverting to the world full of blood and cuts. and i really dont want to. help me, before i get stuck in the darkness i dont wanna be in.

more poems

FAKING IT.

Watch my tears, do not refrain.
No need to fake it all again.
No need to care, and please, don’t smile.
Leave me alone, I’ll be a while.
You shed dead tears, but never weep,
My emotions are for me to keep.
Please don’t pretend, no need to lie,
Just waiting now, waiting to die.
No need to gently stroke my face,
No need to chat, I know my place.
I will not cry, I will not fight,
Drag me now, into the night.
Take my smile, my very last breath,
No need to shush me into death.
I have been ready for some time.
A willingness that is solely mine.
I do not pray, you understand,
No need to falsely take my hand.
I will not weep, when you leave me here,
I do not need you to be near.
I always knew I’d be alone,
No one to love, to call my own.
Take me now into the dark,
Your mind untainted, I left no mark.
I will not struggle, will not plead,
Just leave me here and let me bleed.

numb

All these thoughts that I keep thinking
makes me think I want to stop breathing.
I want these thoughts to get out of my head,
yet, they still come to me while lying in bed.
I keep saying, "Get out, get out!"
but they'll always be there without a doubt.
My mind is polluted with these terrible thoughts,
A web has formed which evil ideas have caught.
I want to get better, but I have lost hope,
I guess now I'll just have to learn to cope.
Cope with the fact that my happiness has died,
and if anyone gives a compliment, I feel they have lied.
I want to lie in my bed all day long;
my emotional status is no longer strong.
A part of me is currently dead,
My body feels full and heavy of lead.
Every day it gets harder to move,
Even at a dance I can't find my groove.
It feels like novacaine has taken over my veins,
I can't even taste the sweetness of candy canes.
Emotions of death finally have come.
I am the human, the one that is numb.

Inside

Written in blood are these verses so cold,
mired in the darkness
of my heart untold.
Unknown, unspoken and yet so loud,
feelings of mine, my questions, my doubts.
Answers are sought for,
but they're found the least,
like running in the darkness,
a beauty from a beast.
The truth or the false will these ever find,
still trapped in a cell, not of bars, of mind.
As the shades grow darker, as the lights dim,
I've a fear, a scare of death deep within.
Will my final breath be so loud
to make a point to the world, to shimmer a cloud.
The solutions will my questions ever know,
cause they're locked away in a place
from friend or foe.

YES!

i got my computer privleges back, and now i can go on during the day and in the sunlight hours of the weekends! yes! feel my hapiness! FEEL IT!!!srry, just the coffee still working its way around me. remember, i love all u idiots 4 being idiots!
ari

Sorry!

sry ppl, that i haven't posted in like ever!!!
So heres the deal;
~ I am now not, being obsessed in what people are doing around me.
~ I am now writing about about my life.
~ I have written like 15 poems, that some sound emo, ill post them soon tho
~ I am now bored out of my mind....
~ I probably wont be going on a whole lot, but I will be going on
~ My best friends still rock, and that will never ever change!
~ My friends are idiots, and i love them 4 it!

crap!

we have mea's! crap crap crapity crap! my brain has already blown up, and i just grew another one, i dont want to loose this one! i HATE MEA'S

ANGEL!!!!

if u can hear me, please stop, or at least try. ive already lost so many friends, and i dont want to loose another. please, fo all of us, stop. im begging you!

Emo Icons

I miss you both

Tombstone Generator


Tombstone Generator

angel:(

im sorry if it doesnt help, but that is the best i can do right now. ive tried to help u b4, but those methods didnt work. so all i have to say is for you to try to when you get depressed, to take ur depression feelings out in something creative, and vent them out to help. not vent them out on ur arm with a sharp item. i hope this helps. ill still try to help, but right now, this is the best i can do.

okay...

i have some advice fro all the cutters in reach of this blog. STOP IT! it is addictive, and it is only hurting urself, and all those around you. i've known many who do this, and 2 of them are some of my best friends. the only advise i can give you is to either whenever you get upset, stay away from all and i mean ALL sharp items. or try and get help. there are people out there who want to help. like me.